Friday, 2 October 2015

Everyone is not to blame, but must accept responsibility anyway

Somewhere in the distance, two handsome men travelled in a bus. Somewhere in the middle, a four year old boy called Haramjada decided to step out for some lemonade. Right in the thick of the action, Rajesh the elephant strolled down the path with a sense of purpose absent in anyone around him. This was because he was alone. It was a sweaty afternoon, and he strolled with this sense of purpose through the front gates of the maidan, leaving giant dollops of shit behind. He was about to hop onto a bus, when he spotted a lemonade stall.

“Hi there, young fellow! Do you fancy a glass of sizzling lemonade? Heehee.”
“Why is it sizzling, fool?!”

Rajesh was not in the mood for funny talk. Polturam, the lemonade seller, responded by making as stern a face as he could. He immediately started giggling again, however, and was about to apologise for the stern face, when Rajesh kicked him in the nose.

“What did I do that for?”
“I don’t know! Why did you?”
“To teach you, and all the unmotivated gigglers of the world a lesson!”
“A lesson we’ll never learn, my friend! Heehee.”
“Oh, I’ll teach it to you, alright!”

Rajesh grabbed all the lemons, plopped them sternly into his mouth, and yelped because they were sour. Polturam laughed out loud, his belly jiggling east and west. An auto crawled towards them.

Rajesh spotted the auto, and knew he had a decision to make. He didn’t have much time to spare, and unless he caught the vehicle, there was a real chance he wouldn’t make it. His life would then not be liveable. He was, however, also an elephant of staunch principles, and he couldn’t leave without teaching Polturam a lesson. His life would then not be bearable. Grabbing the jiggling lemonade seller, he hopped onto the auto, promptly getting kicked out as he didn’t have any change. Turning around, he spotted Bhoda and Dhokla examining the dollops of shit he had left behind. They spotted him, and began running towards him with giant fishing nets.

“There he is, Bhoda!”
“Damn, Dhokla! I didn’t even notice.”
“You may think you’re being funny, but all you do is hurt me.”

Rajesh leapt onto a bus, wisely deciding that the lesson could wait, but freedom couldn’t. The light turned red. Bhoda and Dhokla latched onto a taxi in an attempt to begin an exciting chase sequence. Upon being refused, they leapt onto the opposite end of the same bus.

Rajesh uncurled his trunk, extending it by a metre, and pointed it threateningly at the two caretakers. Bhoda looked him in the eye, and blinked several times soon after. A fly flew into Dhokla’s nose.

“Now, listen here, and listen good, Rajesh.”
“That’s right, Rajesh!”
“If you make a move, I’ll make a false one.”
“If you try to put these pieces together, I’ll keep switching them around for you.”
“Shut the fuck, Dhokla!”
“What’s this about?”
“Oh, you know, Rajesh. You know.”
“I only know what you tell me.”
“I understand how you feel, Rajesh. To not know what’s going to happen tomorrow.”
“Why don’t you ever tell me?!”
“To be moving from place to place, feeling lost all the time, waiting for a realisation or some kind of deeper understanding. It hurts, son. I know it does.”
“Of course you do, we work together!”
“To work is to live, Rajesh. That’s all we’ve got.”
“All I want is what my parents had. And their parents.”
“Well, all I want is for you to love me.”
“But you don’t, do you?!”
“All I want is freedom!”
“Freedom, my boy, is a two-way street. With everyone going one way, some of us have to go the other.”
“Well, why do you think this elephant crossed the road?”
“You don't want us to meet on the opposite side of town, Rajesh.”
“I don’t want to take any sides, Bhoda.”
“I’m afraid you can’t because there is only one, Rajesh.”
“But I want a choice!”
“Fine! Let’s say I give you this apparently free, so called choice. Right now, you and me. What would it be, child?”
“I choose life!”
“Well, we can get you married tomorrow, can’t we, Dhokla?”
“This goddamn fly keeps going into my mouth.”
“I said I choose life!”
“Well, I was never going to kill you, was I?”

Bhoda smiled like he was plotting to kill him. The traffic light turned green. The bus jerked forward unattractively, and Rajesh slipped towards the two handsome men. They dodged him expertly, allowing Bhoda and Dhokla to grab onto him with their nets. They leapt off the moving bus, Dhokla breaking his leg in the process, and walked back towards the circus. As Haramjada drank his lemonade, he saw an elephant in a large net, being carried by two ugly men, one of them limping profusely, back to the cage from where he had expertly picked the lock a few minutes ago. The last thing Rajesh saw before being thrown back in was Polturam giggling at the world as it went by.

1 comment:

Shalmi said...

Let it be noted that years after first finding this blog, right now today I fell in love with you all over again. And this time I'm writing it out, so there.